I figured it out, but I still only have music for safety,
It is depression, it’s been killing me for a while.

Eating is infrequent, emotions unexpressed,
Anger is incendiary but quelled (working on management).
I have truly considered a mental hospital as means of escape,
exclusion, as it would be drastic enough to know the difference
where my mind truly is not settled.

But my soul is empty, along with my stomach,
and all my progress and work is fruitless.

So why should I eat when I produce nothing?
What can I consume that I have not created?

This question has been burrowing and it’s struck the core of doubt.
And I don’t know where the poison is going next.
But I could plan on where I’ll go.

I may be hosting, carrying disease
but Jeremiah 29:11 speaks of a plan
And God, if you’re out there, can I get a hint?